this isn't me

tangle me up in your sweater
i don't want to face the cold truth
split ends rest on my shoulders
the floor stares emptily back at me
and
the fridge door opens to a heavy heart
before bed i'll drink a bottle or two
things seem fine 'til the sun sets
then i'm just alone in my bed

get away

i hate spending time with you.
it makes me feel alone when you're gone.
i feel defensively numb when you're near,
but for some reason let you stay.
sometimes i want to rid you from my brain
and hope never to see you again.

but i know i'll think of you if you're away...

somedays

some days the orange juice goes bad,
but, darling, it's the only thing i have.
i don't want to get out of this mess,
but i have all of these feelings to confess.

some days i'm just no good.
i wish i loved you like you wish i would.
i'm so apathetic i can't be real.
i don't even have a heart for you to steal.

some days the rain comes down.
it saturates through this tired town,
and i'm still here, lonely in my full size bed
there's no reason to explain the tears i've shed

some days i think of you,
mostly your faults, nothing new.
things with us will never be the same.
this life we live is really fucking lame.

some days are colder than others,
but it'll be different tomorrow.
give me back my winter coat,
the last thing i'll ever let you borrow.

some days.

drunk

cherry red popsicles. i have goose bumps again.
tonight i sleep solo. i'll dream of you by my side.
i wish you were sincere and didn't have things to hide.
i'll smoke a bowl and forget these troubles.
you were always better at singles than doubles.